Etiquette Guide For Men: The First Date




1.  Ask the girl out in person or via the phone.  Don’t email.  Don’t text.  That’s lame.  Ask yourself “What’s the worst that could happen?”  She could say no, but if you’ve known her for a while and she’s got a great personality, then chances are she’ll say yes. 

2.  Have a plan.  Please make sure you have a few ideas on hand when you ask her out, or shortly after.  Recently I went on a date and had no idea where we were going for dinner, dessert, etc.  And I really liked that!  There was an element of surprise.  Because it was a double date, the guys got to figure out how to get both girls’ picked up, who would be driving, etc.  So whether you’re just going to dinner, or out to coffee, make sure to not pick her up and say “What do you want to do?” 

3.  Stay In Contact.  If you asked her out on a Monday for Friday night, make sure to send her a text, give her a call, or even a Facebook message to let her know you’re looking forward to seeing her on Friday night.  You’ll also want to let her know how to dress for the evening.  If you’re going for coffee, tell her it’s casual.  If you’re going to see a musical, tell her to dress up a little.  If you’re going to be doing some walking around at any point in the evening, let her know that, as well. 

4.  Pick Her Up.  I know it may be totally out of your way, but chances are that she’s got good restaurants in a 15 minute radius of where she lives.  But don’t get me wrong, if you’re in the Dallas area, or any big city, it’s a very good probability that you’ll have to put a few extra miles on your car.  But making that extra effort speaks volumes.

5.  The Door. Go to the door to pick her up.  Open the car door, every time.  Get every door for her during the date.  At the end of the evening, walk her to her door.  Have you seen Hitch?  If she starts playing with her house key, it’s okay for you to linger a little. 

6.  Be Honest.  If you had a good time and want to see her again, tell her so.  If you had a good time and are unsure of how you feel, let her know that you’d like to go out again and go from there.  But if you really don’t see anything progressing, then gently tell her so.  “I had a really great time tonight, I think we should hang out in a group next time.”  Please spare the promise of “I’ll call you” if you have no intention of doing it. 

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