Dear Sparkly,
My friend is getting married and has registered at some high end stores that, frankly, I can't afford. Why do people expect me to buy them some $500 mixing bowls. Seriously? SERIOUSLY?! I want to be supportive of my friend and her husband-to-be, but what can I do?
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The first thing to understand is that you never, ever have to buy someone a wedding gift. There, I said it. The elephant is in the room and I'm going to say exactly what we're all thinking- your friend is being very unreasonable.
Wedding registries used to be non-existent until our society decided that they didn't want to have to be courteous to their friends and family and graciously accept whatever gift was mailed to them prior the wedding day (yes, gifts were mailed to the couple, not brought to the wedding reception). I remember hearing stories from my mom about some of the items she received for her wedding. Some gifts were good and some not so good.
Within the last 20 years, brides decided that telling everyone what they wanted was acceptable. And while to a certain extent, it is, in my experience, bridal registries are a gateway to greed. Even as the bride walks around the store, some stores provide a "registry expert" to help guide the bride along and show her all the things she's going to need. When i witnessed this particular employee I was dumbfounded.
You have a few options in how to move forward in the gift giving department. You can either ask someone else who is attending the wedding to split the cost of a gift with you, or you can give the happy couple a gift card from one of the selected stores where they are registered.
Don't over stress about what to buy your friend for her wedding. Send her a nice card with a gift card inside and a note, wishing her well on the next step of life's journey. And when the wedding is over, you can pull a Carrie Bradshaw and register for some fabulous shoes that are $500.
(Pardon the language)
My friend is getting married and has registered at some high end stores that, frankly, I can't afford. Why do people expect me to buy them some $500 mixing bowls. Seriously? SERIOUSLY?! I want to be supportive of my friend and her husband-to-be, but what can I do?
-
The first thing to understand is that you never, ever have to buy someone a wedding gift. There, I said it. The elephant is in the room and I'm going to say exactly what we're all thinking- your friend is being very unreasonable.
Wedding registries used to be non-existent until our society decided that they didn't want to have to be courteous to their friends and family and graciously accept whatever gift was mailed to them prior the wedding day (yes, gifts were mailed to the couple, not brought to the wedding reception). I remember hearing stories from my mom about some of the items she received for her wedding. Some gifts were good and some not so good.
Within the last 20 years, brides decided that telling everyone what they wanted was acceptable. And while to a certain extent, it is, in my experience, bridal registries are a gateway to greed. Even as the bride walks around the store, some stores provide a "registry expert" to help guide the bride along and show her all the things she's going to need. When i witnessed this particular employee I was dumbfounded.
You have a few options in how to move forward in the gift giving department. You can either ask someone else who is attending the wedding to split the cost of a gift with you, or you can give the happy couple a gift card from one of the selected stores where they are registered.
Don't over stress about what to buy your friend for her wedding. Send her a nice card with a gift card inside and a note, wishing her well on the next step of life's journey. And when the wedding is over, you can pull a Carrie Bradshaw and register for some fabulous shoes that are $500.
(Pardon the language)
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